resolutions 25-31

7 to go...had i not procrastinated this task might be easier!

25. i resolve to better prepare for my classes at penn tech by looking over the material a day in advance. right now i am looking at the material an hour before class and winging quite a bit of it.

26. i resolve to finish the bible study - discerning the voice of God.

27. i resolve to pay all my bills when i receive them and not wait until the last moment possible. along with this, i resolve to start faithfully paying my phone bill. that is a difficult one since we are all on the same plan and i don't get the bill and mom forgets to have me pay her.

28. i resolve to figure out what i believe. no words come to explain this...i want to be able to defend my faith - but i need to have a firm grasp of what that faith is first. (i'll be honest - i'm not looking forward to this one - i have issues with my thought processes - i'd much rather not think)

29. i resolve to really care for the people i love, my family and friends - to affirm them, to listen, to extend invitations, to pray for them.

30. i resolve to become a better story-teller and to only tell stories if i have thought through their reception.

31. the hardest one of all...i resolve to take a good hard look at my life and what i treasure to be able to name my idols so i may strive to rid myself of them.

resolution 24 and a goal for the spring

tonight when i got into class at penntech, i was out of breath...this is a common occurrance, as the classroom is on the 4th floor. i told the few students in the class that i am making it my goal to make it up the stairs without getting winded by the end of the semester...

as for today's resolution. i realized that in order to keep some of my resolutions, i need to plan time for quiet/rest in the week. as i look at my crazy schedule, i know that will be a little difficult to maneuver.

here goes...

24. i resolve to spend the majority of one night a week in the quiet of my own home. ideally, this would mean that 1 night a week i won't go out, but i realize it would be resolution suicide to say that, especially since the majority of the year that one night a week would have to be on the weekends.

as a start, i am going to make no plans for this sunday night and see how it goes.

resolution 23

i know i've said this before, but it really is amazing how some of my resolutions are decided upon

when i walked into applebee's tonight, i had no idea that today's resolution would be presented to me in a porcelain bowl (it's no silver platter). as i bent over it, it stared up at me and said "this has got to stop"

23. i resolve to watch what i put into my body. milkshakes can go back to 1950, because i drank my last one of the year tonight. i am also going to cut back on all dairy products in general. and when i do have an occasional latte, yogurt, or bowl of ice cream, it will never be accompanied by spicy, fatty, or greasy food.

dinner with friends

i had a wonderful time saturday evening...when you have a rotten day (like today was for me) it helps to treasure the good times...ok, that's not why i'm thinking about saturday, but it has depth, unlike the truth: i just ate some leftovers that reminded me of saturday's events.

on saturday i had dinner with some of my friends: betsy, jana, gary, erik, and elias. unlike normal dinners that we may share, this time we didn't go out to some restaurant. i (with the help of jana and erik who showed up early - actually, everyone showed up early) made pasta, erik brought a salad, and betsy made crazy chocolate chip fudgy things for dessert. it was so much fun! even more so because i actually had it ready when i said i'd have it ready - i'm not usually one for punctuality. :) we even ate in style - dining room table, wine glasses,... if i had really been on my game we would've lit candles, but you can't have everything.

after dinner we went to the susquehanna valley band concert, which made me realize that kids today are super talented...i really doubt we sounded that good when i was in school.

it was great! i even got to end the evening with a little luke from gilmore girls. he's my soulmate :)

that evening made me realize just how enjoyable it is to relax with my friends. some people don't have that, and i need to remember just how good i've got it... i have friends that i can call if i'm feeling down, friends that i can hang out with without feeling the need to talk, people that love me for me and never judge me (no matter how stupid i am being or how many times i mess up), people that know me and still want to be around me, people that i can share my life with - because what good is having a story if you can't share it with someone (i took that line from a movie, but i believe it with all my heart).

i'd like to repeat the cooking for friends experience (the problem is how to organize the occasions so i don't end up having a house full - which wouldn't be horrible, just not as intimate - i liked having a few enough number so no one felt left out and we didn't do the segregation thing - maybe pulling names out of a hat would work for a random dinner party...or not)

resolution 22

tomorrow i head to the dentist for the first time in, let's just say a while, and in honor of that, i am going to start taking better care of my teeth and gums. i don't have the greatest gums as is, and i have this one tooth that is a giant and whose roots are barely covered by my gums. not that you needed to know that, but i'm in a sharing mood. i'm not joking about it being a giant either. when i went to the orthodontist and dentist regularly, they would often shave it down until i writhed in pain...i really wish i could remember how much bigger it was than the others back then, cuz it is still tall. luckily it's on the bottom and my lip covers it up much of the time. even though it's ugly, it is slightly unnerving to think that i may lose it one day because of how bad my gums are (almost nonexistent)...so that brings me to resolution 22

22. i resolve to floss at least 4 times a week. i'd say every day, but you and i both know that won't happen.

resolution 21

so bets and i have been watching a lot of gilmore girls lately, and jana and i came up with a great plan for the year... to watch every last episode of the show. that's right. we're off to a great start, bets and i having finished off season three this evening. bets is so gung ho and addicted that she has determined to purchase the remaining 4 seasons (she talked about ordering them tomorrow when she realized there wasn't another dvd left to continue tonight) that's my little addict. :)

21. i resolve to watch all 7 seasons of the gilmore girls...sooner rather than later hopefully!

resolutions 19 and 20

i'm sitting here watching gilmore girls...big surprise. bets and i are quite concerned about what we will have to look forward to after we have gotten to the season finale... :)

19. i resolve to exercise once a week. possibly with dance dance revolution...

20. i resolve to memorize psalm 139, our church's theme scripture this year.

sorry this one is so boring...television distracts me... :)

time to catch up - starting with resolution 18

wow. so easy to get distracted, especially when i'm away from my computer for a bit...

well, i could've made resolution 18 be to live it up with the hair styles this year, as i would now fit perfectly into a punk rocker line-up...but as i'm not sure if the crazy hair styles will continue...

this weekend we had a young life leaders meeting to plan for the upcoming semester, and i actually got some motivation...a "read the bible in a year" guide. also, while i was there i decided that i really need to find creative ways to re-dedicate myself to young life, so...

18. i resolve to get together with my girls from young life at least twice a month, especially during the summer.

automatic lights

so the only problem with having your headlights set to automatic is that you never EVER think about them. never turn them on, never turn them off. you might be thinking, "the girl's gone nuts, that's the BEST thing about setting your headlights to automatic!"

most days i would agree, but take today for instance...i'm driving through williamsport at 8 pm and someone feels the need to flash their lights at me a few times. i continue driving down the road thinking, what could they have meant? i look around for a cop, but that's not it. i think, maybe they flashed someone else. no, i'm pretty sure it was me. then it hits me, the light on the road in front of me is coming from streetlamps, not my headlights...why? because my car spent some quality time in the garage this morning.

don't the mechanics realize that the simple act of turning off my lights plays havoc with my mind? please, leave the lights, radio, driver's seat, and mirrors the way you found them...that's all i ask.

resolutions 16 and 17

tonight i was driving along in the snow and this truck was going really slow in front of me, so i decided to pass him. the left lane of 15 was extremely clear of snow, showing that others had passed vehicles in that same location, and i had no misgivings about passing this truck. until...as i am coming along side of him to pass, he matches my speed. i go faster, he goes faster. i start to wonder if this was such a good idea, but i'm already committed. the piles of snow to the immediate left of my tires seem to be drawing me in, and i realized it wasn't worth it. i slowed down and pulled in behind the truck, who at this point was going far beyond a safe speed in the snow.

you may be wondering where i'm going with this...

16. i resolve to drive at a more respectable speed, especially in inclement weather. i will go no faster than 80 on 80, no matter how late i'm running, and i will try to keep it to 75 mph as the norm.

as for #17, i'm not really sure how this will play out, but i'd like to do away with the "what ifs" and "if onlys". life is too short and too precious to waste it on dreams instead of reality.

17. i resolve to live in the moment...i will not worry about my future - it is in God's hands, i will not live in the past - there is no way for me to change it, i will find joy in the now - whatever God wants with and for me, is good enough (better than i could know) for me.

no more daydreaming my life away on the "what ifs" and "if onlys"

resolution recap

while i'm patiently waiting for my 16th resolution to reveal itself, i'll give a brief account of how resolved i have been so far in my other efforts.

1) jana and i have talked at least once a week about how things are going spiritually and otherwise with one another - a marked improvement over last year. i have even found that it has made me feel more free about talking about my spiritual ups and downs lately...
--- 2) if i remember, this was my shower resolution...amazing what a little determination will do. the closest i got to failing was that i didn't have time to wash my hair in the shower one morning.
-------- 3) my car has an appointment tomorrow for a general maintenance...
-------------- 4) someone asked me today about this one...basically the idea is to be honest about my procrastination...it is a fact...and i'm not about to make an excuse for procrastinating on a few of my resolutions: i'll just let you in on my plan to accomplish them
----------------------- 5) last week i met my quota of well-balanced meals and cooking, but this week is looking sketchy
--------------------------------- 6) i started in genesis last night
------------------------------------------- 7) i have written once in my prayer journal...
--------------------------------------------------- 8) i signed up for a course...that's as far as i've gotten
------------------------------------------- 9) i sent out a card to my stepgrandma
--------------------------------- 10) i am writing this from bed, where i've been since 9:40 - i was close
----------------------- 11) tuesday was the only day this week i didn't get a good long walk in...today we walked to chinese...my stomach revolted
--------------- 12) i got a few days left in the week to get it cleaned...
-------- 13) scrapbooking...it'll happen
--- 14) buying abba's child is on my to-do list tomorrow.
15) i almost cried today listening to a favorite cd, ray lamontagne...so i turned it off.

well, there you have it...i've just decided that this will be my only full-fledged recap, as it takes up quite a bit of room, not to mention that it's tedious.

resolution 15

as i was driving to penn tech today after work, a song came on the radio about God being our everything...as usual lately when i think about my relationship to God vs. my relationship to others in my life, i started to tear up, wondering how i can get Him back on the throne of my heart and start yearning for more of Him rather than more of someone or something else...i know the correct answer to that question...read my Bible, pray, focus on the things that He has done for me (and most of those are already a part of my resolutions). but i doubt myself and my ability to change. then it hits me...thank God it's not up to me to do the changing! i still doubt, but at least i don't feel as guilty. focusing on God's strength and power is going to be key in this, i can already tell...

this one is going to be a challenging resolution, but i am determined...

15. i resolve to give my thoughts over to God, continually if need be. i will not shove them back into my head and heart until i explode under their pressure. when my thought patterns start to digress into unhealthy territory, i will stop everything and pray that God will take captive my mind and heart.

this is going to be a tough one, and at the moment i need to stop and pray, because just writing about this topic is starting the wheels a-turning...

resolutions 13 and 14

i'm gonna be honest, cuz let's face it, honesty is the best policy...usually. this is getting difficult. the resolutions aren't popping into my head as easily as they were at the beginning. i guess that means i either need to buck up and choose some challenges that are even more difficult to commit to, or i need to get more creative...what a novel idea!

seeing as how my creativity has all but left me for good, i guess it's time to practice and get those creative juices flowing again. a few years ago, i started 2 different scrapbooks when my mom bought me loads of creative memory stuff. one of them is a "sisters" book of, you guessed it, my sister and i and our youthful and more recent experiences together. i have pictures out the waazoo just waiting to be organized into a masterpiece.

13. i resolve to get my sisters scrapbook up to date...i'm glad i have all year! (i don't know how i ended up with a resolution that is super difficult to keep AND requires creativity)

now it's time for the 14th resolution to materialize into being just as effortlessly as the 13th did. as you can see from the timestamp on this post, today is my "after 9:30" weeknight for the week. i just got home recently from jana's, where we watched "one night with the king," a film about esther. both this movie and one of the previews before it happened to be based on books i had read. and i can feel the 14th resolution sneaking up on me, even as i look at my nightstand filled with unread books...

14. i resolve to read 12 books this year, 6 fiction, and 6 of the many "inspirational" books that i have had on my list for a while now.

the first book i will read, as soon as i buy a copy of my own, will be "abba's child" by brennan manning. i started reading a friend's copy a few months back, and i stopped for 2 main reasons: 1) it made me face myself and i was chicken, and 2) i really wanted to write in the margins as opposed to scribbling notes on whatever paper i had lying around. from what i have read and from what my friends tell me, it is an excellent book and i look forward to finishing it.

rereading this post, i find the last line of the opening slightly ironic! :) i hope you enjoy the irony too, or at least can smirk at my enjoyment of it.

resolution 12

i seriously considered doing laundry today, but my clothes basket is full of clean clothes from wash day last week. i have clothes enough to wear, but the vicious circle of my room getting clean just to get a mess again is starting to tick me off. i am 26 years old...i should easily be able to keep a room or two clean. to put my clothes away when i wash them and not 2 weeks after doing so.

12. i resolve to clean my room this week and to keep it clean. when i do laundry, i will put said laundry away within 2 days. if my room gets dirty, i will clean it on saturday mornings so the effect isn't long-term.

this will be a difficult resolution to keep for me - i'm a little "add" about things like that.

resolution 11

today i walked to lunch in the rain (it was just a drizzle). i didn't care - i'm in town and will walk as long as i can. on my walk, this wave of exhilaration swept over me and i was happy. and when it did, i realized that i love taking walks and i should really do it more often.

11. i resolve to take more walks. when the weather allows, i will get my sneakers on and go out and enjoy my environment. by myself or with others doesn't matter, cuz i know it'll feel great - who knew i'd enjoy something so healthy!

only 3 more possible days to walk to lunch...and i'm making the most of every opportunity.

resolution 10

i went to bed rather late last night. in fact the last few nights have been late ones as i am not listening to my body very well these days. i get home exhausted but decide to fill my nogen (sp?) with television instead of going to bed (gilmore girls is addicting). i have been getting up every morning for a shower, though!

10. i resolve to go to bed earlier on the weekdays (like i used to). i will be in bed by 9:30 every weeknight save one. that will give me one evening to splurge if i want to.

i'm hoping that this helps me stick to some of the other resolutions(like reading my Bible, etc) that i have made

resolution 9

tonight at prayer meeting, someone mentioned the wonderful group of "prime-timers" we have at church, and i got to thinking about how much they all have meant to me over the years. like us all, i'm sure that they would enjoy a cheery note, so i thought it would be nice to start sending them cards once in a while.

9. i resolve to send 1 card a month to someone "closer to the Kingdom"

what is the proper thing to call someone that is getting on in years?

resolution 8

at work today i filled out a self-appraisal and goal-setting form for the new year (i guess technically the self-appraisal was for 2007...). anyway, we each have to set two goals for ourselves, and one of mine was to get some Act 48 credit hours this year

in my form i said i wanted to earn at least 15 hours, which would mean i'd have to take one online class. however, i really need to get a jump on the 139ish hours i need before december 2010, so...

8. i resolve to take at least 2 online classes through the dept of ed this year - in other words, i resolve to earn at least 30 credit hours this year.

time to hit the books...i really enjoyed college and learning, but i'm not looking forward to the work...i'm glad that idea of mine to be a full-time student didn't work out for me :)

city life and country life

jan 8th and pushing 70º. i really don't think it can get much better than this!

i was taking a walk a moment ago in Bloomsburg, lamenting the thought of moving to the new office next week, which is outside of town, and i started to think how wonderful it would be to live in a town or city.

i've always thought i'd want to live on the verge of the country, so i could have a nice size house and lots of land. but i'm just not sure, so i've decided to compare and contrast the appeal and magnetism of both the country and the city. i'll even throw in a small town atmosphere.

Country:
1. land to romp around in (volleyball, football, frisbee, baseball, fourwheelers)
2. peace and quiet
3. not too much traffic going by
4. nature

Town:
1. in the heart of everything
2. essentials are only a walk away (dining, movies, shops) - save gas money
3. enjoyment of the outdoors - parks
4. town festivals
5. did i mention you can walk places?
6. could still have a decent size yard
7. close enough to the country that you could still get away from it all

City:
1. culture (plays, concerts, museums, ethnic cuisine,...all just a walk away)
2. proximity to the airport (for traveling purposes)
3. parks
4. essentials are only a walk away(and oh, the delight of the walk!)
5. perfect for mopeds
6. lights and activity
7. never boring
8. inspires creativity

for today it looks like the city wins, but i guess to be fair to the country and town i'd have to look at the cons of each place...

resolution 7

i've noticed recently that my brain doesn't seem to work all that well. thoughts in general are only half developed, making the expression of them all the more difficult and confusing to those within earshot.

along with this brain "impediment" the creativity that i once felt was my own has been lacking. so this evening when Jana was telling me about her own resolutions, and i realized how wise she was in making some of them, i felt no guilt in asking to make yet another of them my own.

7. I resolve to write in a prayer journal at least once a week.

my prayer life is such that i should immediately put it on life support, so i am hoping journaling my prayers once a week will help me get back on the right path

resolution 6

procrastination has taken its toll yet again...

as yesterday (the day i should've written this) was sunday, and i actually opened my Bible, i think it is a good idea to change the settings in which i read from God's word. don't get me wrong, opening the Bible and following along in church is great, it's just that i tend to not open it at other times of the week (which is probably part of the reason my walk with God is at a standstill and or slipping).

I've started reading the Bible from front to back many times before, but never have managed to finish. This year that is going to change...

6. I resolve to read the entire Bible this year. In so doing, I hope to learn more about my God and Savior, and learn to feast on His words and presence again, as I did when I was first saved.

resolution 5

today betsy and i went to the natural food store and while we were there bets made a slightly impulsive purchase (i approved) of hand crafted chopsticks. we decided that we could make sushi or maybe some chinese food - which would then produce a use for them...possibly a themed dinner with the girls.

so, what does this have to do with a resolution??? i don't eat many "meals" per se, and when i do they are mainly frozen foods that i can nuc with little or no effort...it really all does come back to me not being motivated...how interesting...

5. I resolve to consciously eat better. Througout the winter months, while the 'rents are away, I will cook something at least every other week. I will also eat at least 3 well-balanced meals each week (vegetables and all).

this should be fun.

resolution 4

all i have to say is notice today's date...needless to say i didn't exactly get around to making my resolution yesterday...sadly i'm not all that surprised...

i'd like to say that i didn't have time to get it done, but that would be a complete lie. lately i have come to the unwelcome realization that i make excuses for many acts of procrastination. true the internet was down at work all afternoon and that's usually when i take a break to write these, but what about last night after the decorations were put away and i sat down to watch 8 hours of Gilmore Girls? (definitely didn't intend to watch tv that long...) my point is that although i know i can't change overnight, i don't want to continue making excuses for my faults.

4. I resolve to stop making excuses for my procrastination and lack of motivation. If I should falter, which I obviously will, I will not allow myself to get dejected. Instead, every time that I make an excuse for not getting something done, I will put a dollar in a jar.

I'm not sure what I'm going to use the money for quite yet...possibly towards a trip to Mexico with TETM...the payment idea just popped into my head when I started to realize that there was no way in hell that I could keep this resolution completely, and I didn't want to word it vaguely and give myself an excuse not to improve... :)

Speaking of improvement...about halfway through writing this, I actually got off my butt and cleaned out our fridge, one of the many projects on my list. It's a start!

what a shock!

this afternoon i leaned over the partition wall and was shocked by what happened next...both figuratively and literally. in fact, the people who witnessed my reaction were a little shocked themselves.

the partition wall comes close to shoulder height on me, and when i leaned over my chin grazed the top (which is metal). i've never experienced an electric shock on my chin before, it goes right up through the teeth...superfun! or not. that was about an hour ago and my chin still feels a little funny...

static seems to be in the air today, or at least hovering around me, because everything i touch sends that crazy sensation right through my fingers...oh how i loathe the winter...i meant love, of course...

resolution 3

Today I got the oil changed in my car, a very good thing for a vehicle after a certain amount of time or miles. In fact they say that you should get the oil changed in your car every 3 months or 3000 miles, a rule of autocare that I have known and not followed for at least 10 years.

I bought a brand new car about 3 months ago and have since put 5,600 miles on it...this is my first oil change...and the first time oil will be put into it... :( I know, I'm cringing just writing it. I'm a horrible car owner and that brings me to my third resolution of 2008...

3. I will regularly (every other week) check the oil in my car and will get regular oil changes (at least every 3500 miles).

I feel as though the way I treat my car closely resembles the way I take care of myself...the outside is normally spotless (maybe not in the winter when crud builds up [on the car] and I am more lazy) but the inside is neglected...

resolution 2

I feel gross, probably because I didn't get up in time for a shower this morning. Sadly, that is an all too common occurrance. Don't get me wrong...I do shower at other times of the day, and generally take between 5 and 7 showers a week (ok, that might have grossed some of you out). Truth be told, I LOVE taking showers, I just don't always take the time. Which brings me to my second resolution for 2008:

2. I resolve to wake up in time to take a shower every morning. This does not include sick days, holidays, or any day when I am off work. I can choose to renig on this resolution on days succeeding those when I take a shower directly before going to bed.

I hope that covered all the bases. So either I need to start taking showers at night (which doesn't work due to the wet hair issue) or I start getting up earlier. How wonderful it will be to not experience days like today...

I'm heading home to take a shower!

resolution 1

Happy New Year! I asked someone today if they made new year's resolutions and they said why make 'em if you're just going to break 'em? They had a point. And I haven't made resolutions for many years partly for that reason. But another friend, my accountability partner, and I also talked about resolutions...namely how we had said we would be accountability partners - we gave ourselves the name alright, but that's really as far as it went. Were we not sincere enough in our desire to keep each other accountable? I don't think that is it at all...Life happens, and memories go to pot...

This year, I am going to make 31 resolutions, 1 for each day of January, and make every effort to hold true to them. Maybe I should start by looking up the definition for resolve and resolution...resolution: a formal expression of opinion, will, or intent

1. I resolve to be a true accountability partner to my friend Jana. I will be intentional in our conversations, asking about her bible study, prayer life, and her spiritual walk in general. I will be there for her when she needs to talk, will listen and not rush to share my own problems, and will encourage her.