my dance with franco

last night my brother and meg took us all (the fams) to dinner and a show. the show we saw was "holiday show at the swing club" in a black box theatre on the 4th floor of this random building... there were probably about 80 people in the audience. we doubled as the audience at the swing club.

it was really "hip", set on new year's eve of 1943 at this swing club...so the music (live band) was phenomenal and the singing superb. did i mention there was dancing in the show as well?

after this one guy (frankie) sang "night and day" he came onto the dance floor and mentioned that he was looking for a dance partner... i didn't stand a chance. in fact, i almost feel as if i was set up.

our group sat in the second and third row of the audience - i was sitting on the center aisle, a seat which i would've sat in no matter where the rest of our party sat. why you ask? to further my likelihood of being chosen, probably...we were a group of 11...5 couples and me, and that seat happened to be in a group of 3 - the odd chair out. in the row in front of us were ladies around the age of 85. to combat these evils, as frankie walked towards us, i instinctively averted my eyes, pulling the "don't call on me" trick that works well in most educational environments. it didn't work last night. even with my eyes focused elsewhere, it was impossible to miss seeing him extend his hand to me.

being the gracious individual that i am (and since he was cute) (and since i thought it would be even more embarassing to deny him), i placed my hand in his and was led to the dance floor. he told me i danced like a professional (he lied). and i have to admit i was slightly disappointed that spins were minimal and it was a slow dance rather than swing.

afterwards, beth (meg's sis) asked if i got his number, kevin said i did a good job but that i tried to lead, dad said i should put dancing in the show on my resume, bets affirmed that he was indeed cute, and meg, beth and bets all informed me that i was beet red while dancing (in front of 80 people, might i add)

the actor's real name is franco, which is much more appealing than frankie to be sure.

the experience made me aware of two things: and if you decide to ask, i'll hopefully still remember what they are.

office space

we (4 adventurous types) took a field trip today to the new office building...2 1/2 weeks til it is done and we move in!

3 realizations struck me as our tour progressed.
1) I'm going to miss my desk (most particularly my personal shelves) - once you get a organizational style down, it's hard to change.
2) I need to invest in an ipod - it's going to be loud in there, with real walls being minimal and many phone conversations going on at once.
3) I need to always take stock of what I've got and be thankful. - I wonder how close I'll be to the water cooler?

It's going to be nice in the new place, but I'm also seeing glimpses into my thoughts that I don't particularly enjoy - a material side of me broke forth and jealousy gained a foothold as I looked at some of the office space that is not to be mine...

How amazing (or not so amazing) it is, the discontentment we could forego if only we would let go of our selfishness...contentment is most readily experienced when I stop dreaming over wants and desires and enjoy God's gifts of friendship, beauty, and peace (among other things).

Christmastime is here again...

so, i don't know about you, but i think this little quiz thing pegged my outlook at Christmastime pretty well, especially the bit about not liking the holiday rush.

What The Holidays Mean to You

For you, the holidays are about emotional connections and bonds. You are happiest being around those you love. You celebrate the holidays in a minimalist style. You are likely to only give one great present and decorate your house with a few special items. During the holidays, you feel magical. You love all of the decorations and how happy people are. You like to sit back and take it all in. You think the holidays should be comforting and relaxing. You don't like the holiday rush... you just like the simple pleasure of the holidays. Your best holiday memories are warm and intimate. You remember special moments more than gifts or parties.

What Do the Holidays Mean to You?

everything just gets crazy around this time: cookie and party overload. i have already eaten about 2 dozen+ cookies and gone to at least 4 holiday parties... listening to the radio the other day, i heard about this holiday calendar on which family members can all write their Christmas plans (is there room to write 3 activities per evening?, cuz that is the way it always seems to go down). i realize that sounded a little grumpy, but as my little synopsis says, "the holiday should be relaxing," not go go go. sometimes i think about how peaceful that first Christmas was and wish most of the hustle and bustle would disappear...

and if you think about all the people that do their christmas shopping super early, shouldn't the malls be slightly less crowded this time of year?...really

the water cooler

i have access to a most wonderful convenience - the office water cooler. in previous jobs, there was no such thing, so its functionality completely took me by surprise!

Testimonials
- i used to actually pay to have my thirst satisfied throughout the day, but now i walk to the cooler!
- i tried heating up tap water in the microwave once and it was tepid at best. then i discovered the hot water lever on the water cooler, and now i have steaming hot chocolate or tea whenever i want.
- the discovery of the hot water lever opened up a world of possibilities for me, the most important being breakfast. i now have a cup of apple cinnamon oatmeal almost every morning, compliments of the water cooler.

so don't underestimate the water cooler, and never take your water delivery guy for granted - he makes your work environment a better place to be.

and 1 more thing. if you have access to a water cooler (that your company pays to keep filled) what are you doing spending your own money on bottles of water? get yourself a cup and take a walk to the cooler.
Math fact: If you buy just one bottle of water for every day you go to work, assuming that a bottle of water costs $1.25, which is being generous, that's at least $325 a year that you could save!

a test of patience, among other things

God tested my patience this weekend, and I can safely say that I failed miserably.
a word to the wise: lack of sleep can make an otherwise annoying situation incredibly stressful (that is of course in addition to being annoying)

When I pray, which I would love to say is daily, I often ask that I learn from my mistakes and the mistakes of others. I see the mold my surroundings want to force me into, the traits of my predecessors taking root in myself, and I cringe at the thought that I will be a mirror image (or worse, a collage) of my parents' worst selves. The unneeded hurt and frustration that certain attitudes and careless words can cause is just too much for an emotional individual like myself. There was a time not too long ago that I would've said I had ceased to be emotional, when in fact I would allow nothing and no one close enough to affect me. Now I am back to being affected by everything except the one thing that matters most - my relationship with God.

I think I'd like to find a "happy" medium in which I could feel, but not necessarily allow every little frustration, hurt, and heartache to throw me into a tailspin. Of course, the only way I will get to that point is by focusing not on myself, or others, or circumstances, but on the One and Only constant in life - God. If I could convince my heart (my head already knows it) to believe that He is in control, and He is good, and He has a plan, and I am daily in that plan...I think I could get by without letting my family put me in a bad mood and without crying myself to sleep because of a lost hope.

Keep chasing me God! I need you.

what's in a name?

at work i go by a variety of nicknames.

most of them are quite fitting like "math girl" "jean-jean" or "BKD" (for beekeeper's daughter). i even answer to "cookie" - that would be because someone mentioned cookies one day and i promptly appeared on the scene (tell me that you wouldn't do the same for a home-made cookie!).

some are a little harder to fathom, but appreciated none-the-less.

today while we oohed and aahed over an engagement, i was told that i couldn't get married as my career would never allow it (all that traveling to europe to walk the catwalks)...which brings me to one of the more interesting nicknames that i have been given in the office: "supermodel"

i always find it hard to take complements (not that this is one, necessarily) about appearance. although i have started to truly believe that i have a little something in the area of looks, i always have a firm foot on the ground (sure i'm pretty, but not as pretty as...). how many of us tend to not give ourselves enough credit in that area, always pleasantly surprised when someone makes a comment, and yet still slightly doubtful?

while the whole supermodel thing could never happen (call me crazy, but i like to eat!), it has made me think about the kind of lives most of those women lead and wonder, how do they survive that pressure? i'm sure i would crack and be an emotional wreck.

blog name

you don't want to know how long it took me to come up with a name for my blog.

you also don't want to know the others i thought of, but I'll mention a few of them anyway: a mind of its own, a tangential view, life out of focus (i kind of liked that one).

"...but i digress" is the most concise way to say that this blog will probably be quite random, as the thoughts I have throughout the day are just that.